“million dollar baby”

“million dollar baby”

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My daughter’s boyfriend had us all watch “Million Dollar Baby” the other night. It was a good movie — well-made, engrossing, creative, understated. It conveyed powerful emotions with spare action and spare dialogue. I enjoyed watching the movie — and I am no fan of boxing — but I didn’t like the ending.

WARNING: STOP READING NOW IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN THE MOVIE AND DON’T WANT ME TO SPOIL IT FOR YOU!

What does give a life value?
When is suffering no longer redemptive or no longer redeemable?
When is a life no longer worth living?

I grant that I know nothing of what it is like to be in a body like Maggie’s … a body useless and wasting away. And I know nothing of being in Frankie’s position … seeing the one I dearly love in that powerless and humiliating state. But suicide for the one, assisting suicide for the other, seem too easy and even selfish. The movie creates a great deal of sympathy for that choice, paints it as a redemptive choice — letting Maggie “go out” while she has it all, instead of letting her linger and lose everything.

But what is the “everything” she risks losing? Her success, the achievement of her life’s dream? But it seems to me that the most valuable thing she gains in the course of the film is Frankie’s love. She gains a father. He gains a daughter. He grieves because she asks him to let her go. But is it not this love itself that gives her life value? That love continues, loving her always and still as she is … forever. Loving her because she is.

And that is what God’s love is like, too. Loving us as we are, just because we are. At her best, Maggie showed the strength and beauty of her spirit, her loyalty, her faith … turning down a contract with a rival manager to stay with Frank, turning away her heartless and greed-crazed family members, not letting herself be consumed with self-pity.

Would it not be fitting if Maggie’s final act of strength and beauty and loyalty and faith were to entrust herself to God — as long as she has breath, to allow Frankie to love her and be loved by her — to live in joy even in the presence of suffering for both of them, to live with courage and will and hope in the face of her greatest challenger?

As I watched the movie, I too was filled with grief at her loss, at our loss of her grace and fire and passionate physicality. But I wanted her to live, to win this last fight, not concede, to reveal to us the real depth and strength of her character. And I wanted Frankie to say “No” and stand by it, to tell her that her life was still valuable, that he loved her and that love made her life valuable, that she has not lost and will not lose anything that matters!

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i’m back

i’m back

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I’m back … after twenty-six days of vacation, 5300 miles on the road, passing through eighteen states and two provinces, time shared with many, many friends and dear family members, time in boats on Lake Superior, on Lake Huron, and on the Atlantic Ocean. It was glorious! I am filled up once more with deep wonder at the grandeur of what God has fashioned and the extraordinary blessing of being allowed to enjoy it.

And my question today is this: which is more “real” — home and work, or vacation?!

Of course, both are real. Human life is about being productive, about “making a living” and about “making a difference.” It is about providing and contributing and about doing something worthwhile with the heart and brain and limbs God has given you. We are in some sense measured by what we have done … for the sake of those who depend on us, for the sake of humanity, for the sake of the kingdom.

But I am convinced that much of what God intends for us is pure joy! … that we are given life and breath not merely to be productive, but to see and hear and taste and feel and smell some small part of all the wonders and delights and surprises to be found in the world God made and called good … that life is being as well as doing, being alive in the world and being alive to the world, breathing deeply of all that is around us and giving God thanks.

I have breathed deeply … and today I give God thanks!

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as a mighty ocean

as a mighty ocean

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O the deep, deep love of Jesus
Vast, unmeasured, boundless, free,
Rolling as a mighty ocean
In its fullness over me.

Standing on a boat thirty miles offshore, with no land in sight in any direction, the imagery of this favorite hymn comes to life.

vast, unmeasured …

All there is is ocean — underneath me, all around me. There is seemingly no end to these waters, as far as both eye and imagination can see. This is what Jesus’ love is like! Without limit and without end! Rolling as a mighty ocean in its fullness over me …

boundless, free …

From this vantage point it is clear: the land does not put boundaries on the sea; the sea puts boundaries on the land. The sea is everything — foundation, source, sustainer — from which all else rises to life.

And the sea is itself a living thing, not made heavy or slow or inflexible by its great size. It is lithe and dancing and free! Always in motion, always changing, unpredictable, uncontrollable. You don’t tell Jesus what to do or where to go … but Jesus’ love is there, boundless and free, of its own choice, of his own will.

Today, from this happy vantage point, the wonder of the love of Jesus is impressed on me … It is like this! Like this ocean! Rolling in its fullness over me!

May the eyes of your heart, the eyes of your imagination, allow you too to fathom the breadth and depth of the love of Jesus for you …

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on the water

on the water

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I am not quite amphibious … but I do love the water. I love being in the water and on the water, watching the water move, listening to the water. Many of my most memorable life experiences have been associated with bodies of water — Huron, Superior, Prentiss Bay, Dog Lake, Dead River, Kennebec River, Big Sandy River, Cascapedia River, St. John River, Beck’s Pond, Bear Creek.

Water is essential to life, certainly in a physical sense, but — at least for me — also in a spiritual sense. Water refreshes, revives, soothes, excites. Water engulfs, uplifts, expands the mind, settles the heart. When I am on the water, I feel most myself and most connected — to the natural world and to the One who made it.

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fixed on jesus

fixed on jesus

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Let us run with determination the race that lies before us … keeping our eyes fixed on Jesus.

There are a few phrases in scripture that speak with particular clarity and power. This is one of them. It speaks a word the Church needs to hear! This is what holds us together. This is what gives integrity to the Church’s mission. In the face of broad disagreement about theology, about ethics, about church and culture, about worship style, about evangelism, about mission itself, if we simply keep our eyes fixed on Jesus, we will not lose our way.

Sure, we will even disagree about Jesus! But the key is not what we think about Jesus, or what we think Jesus is telling us or anybody else to do. The key is not what we think. The key is keeping our eyes fixed on Jesus! The key is not letting our attention be captured by other commitments, other priorities, other loves.

This word speaks to the Church, but it also speaks to me. In the midst of struggle and pain, joy and sorrow, success and failure, exhiliration and disapppointment, clarity and confusion … I keep my eyes fixed on Jesus. It is the only way …

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poor in spirit

poor in spirit

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Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven …

In Luke’s version, Jesus says, Blessed are you who are poor. Luke draws attention to Jesus’ offer of grace and favor to those people human society has cast aside. Luke celebrates Jesus’ stirring announcement of good news to the poor — to those who are quite literally poor. But in Matthew’s version, Jesus says, Blessed are the poor in spirit … Meaning those who recognize their own spiritual bankruptcy, who realize their desparate need for God’s grace and forgiveness? Probably …

But what if the word poor in this instance was still understood in its primitive sense as referrring to material poverty? Then what might Jesus mean by poor in spirit? Poor … in spirit. In spirit, laying aside claim to anything we may possess. Acknowledging in our hearts and minds that whether we have much or whether we have little, all that we have we hold in trust. It belongs to someone else. It is ours to use … at the pleasure of our Master.

When we are poor in spirit, our possessions do not control us. We let go. We let go of everything. We are poor … in spirit. We have nothing. And yet, we have everything … because ours is the kingdom of heaven! When we are poor in spirit, our possessions do not get in the way of our relationship with God. And when we are poor in spirit, our possessions do not get in the way of our relationships with each other. There are no “class” differences, because we are poor alike, and since what we have we hold in trust, what we have is readily shared. When we are truly poor in spirit, it may be that no one need be poor in reality! (See Acts 4:32-35!)

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with boldness and humility

with boldness and humility

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Two week before the opening of the United Church of Christ General Synod in Atlanta, I expressed my hopes for the coming deliberations:

May the Holy Spirit lead our church as we struggle with difficult issues, as we seek to know the mind of Christ. May we act with all boldness, and love each other with all humility …

It seems that my wish has come true. Reports from General Synod describe an especially solemn and respectful and careful deliberation on the issue of same-gender marriage, from committee work through the floor debate and the final delegate vote. The UCC Newsroom gave this report of the proceedings:

Delegates wrestled with the resolution for about an hour before casting a decisive vote in favor of the resolution that was refined and recommended late Sunday by a 54-member Synod committee. The document was altered by only one amendment, which delegates readily accepted, that expressed a spirit of concern for those who must deal with the resolution’s impact in the months ahead.

When debate was closed — with only a whimper of opposition — a hush fell over the great hall of Atlanta’s Georgia World Conference Center. The Rev. Bernice Powell Jackson, executive minister of Justice and Witness Ministries, then asked moderator Eric C. Smith, who led the proceedings, for a moment of collective prayer. Delegates prayed silently.

Moments later, when voting began, a horde of raised hands — holding green voting cards — told the world that the resolution had passed overwhelmingly. Afterwards, instead of loud applause, there was a dignified moment of stillness broken only by the voice of the Rev. John H. Thomas who offered a prayer.

“Lord Jesus…We give thanks for your presence, especially here this morning,” the UCC’s general minister and president prayed in a soft, pastoral voice. “We have felt your warm embrace, stilling us as we tremble with joy, with hope, with fear, with disappointment…Let us use our hands not to clap, but to wipe away every tear…”

I am glad for the dignity and spiritual sensitivity of the process … even when I would have voted against the resolution itself. This issue has such power to divide, and that, I think, is what is most dangerous for the church as we struggle to be faithful. I can live with a church that has disagreements, even serious diagreements, among its members, as long as we are together genuinely seeking the mind of Christ and acknowledging our oneness with brothers and sisters who are doing the same.

Unfortunately, the grace and dignity of the Synod process has not been followed by the many of the folks offering their post-vote commentaries. Two examples from the UCC Blog:

One response: God is still speaking, but the General Synod of the UCC by passing the Resolution in Support of Equal Marriage Rights for All, has arrogantly supposed to speak for God. Marriage between one man and one woman is a reality established by God in creation and reflected in the church itself. This resolution does not validate same sex relationships but only invalidates and de-legitimizes the UCC as a religious body. This decision will force many congregations to disassociate and will cause the further decline of this historic denomination …

Another response: To those who want to continue hating, misinterpreting Scripture and selling our Lord short, see ya! Those of us who have taken on the mission of love, intelligence, acceptance and fair-mindness our Church will be stronger and our faith will be stronger!! We don’t need judgmental hate-mongers and homophobes in our midst. Go join those who can’t and don’t think for themselves. There are plenty of “leaders” like Dobson will will take your money and teach you how to hate even more.

There it is — “us” and “them” … the “good guys” and the unchristian heathens. Now matter where you come down on the issue, stooping to such name-calling is the real travesty. God forgive us. And God help us to continue to struggle together … with boldness and humility.

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who am I?

who am I?

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Who am I?

I may spend an inordinate amount of time and energy and worry trying to “make a name” for myself … when I already have a name. God has given me my name: my name is “child of God!” I am a human being, made in God’s own image, and my highest calling, indeed my only calling, is to reflect that image as best I can.

We need to remember our true names! We need to remember the true name God has given to each person we encounter. It is only when we forget that we lose ourselves in depair or become engulfed in great battles over politics or values. Remembering keeps things in perspective and reminds us we have nothing to lose … because everything that matters is already ours and will be ours forever.

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