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Category: humility

emmanuel

emmanuel

From I Like Being Five Years Old, an entry by Debi Sanders last week on the inward/outward website:

My friend Kim, who worked with Good Shepherd Ministries for the last ten years, just returned from a year in Haiti where her only “job” was to be with people and build friendships. The Haitians were in awe that an American would come to live with them and not try to “fix” them or improve them or undertake a project.

Jesus certainly did “fix” people’s lives. He healed their diseases, forgave their sins, challenged them to give up their “idols.” But, first of all, he was Emmanuel, God with us. He ate with “undesirables.” He engaged in lengthy conversations with Jewish lawyers and Samaritan women. He invested himself fully and personally in a small group of close friends. Jesus modeled for us a lifestyle of service, but a servanthood that begins just by being there, by being with, by entering into relationship.

That’s why I like Debi Sanders’ description of her friend’s “job” and the reaction of her Haitian friends so much. It takes profound humility — and deep respect — to be ready to spend time with people instead of “coming to their rescue.” And when you are ready to do that, you may just find out along the way that you have as much to gain as to give. You may find out that you needed rescuing just as much! And you will be doing what Jesus does …

mia or barry?

mia or barry?

Mia Hamm and the 1999 World Cup Trophy

On our way home to Iowa from our vacation in Maine, we stayed with a friend in Oneonta, New York, and visited the National Soccer Hall of Fame. On August 26, Mia Hamm and Julie Foudy will be honored there as 2007 inductees. Here’s hoping that Barry Bonds, the new “home run king” of baseball, will not merit such an honor in nearby Cooperstown …

Let’s see, Mia or Barry?

One an athlete of character, intensity, passion, compassion, humility, generosity, and unselfishness. The other almost certainly a cheater.

One a player of America’s game, discrediting the game, discounting his teammates, and casting a long shadow over a hallowed record. The other a player of the world’s game, doing more than any other single individual to inspire a new generation of girls (and boys) to a love for that game, for sport itself, and for joy of being team.

One taking the fun out of the game. The other reminding us that fun is what games are supposed to be about!

the world doesn’t revolve around you

the world doesn’t revolve around you

Senator Barack Obama delivered the commencement address today at Southern New Hampshire University. He talked of three lessons he had learned about growing up, about becoming an adult and putting away childish things (1 Corinthians 13:11).

The latter two of the three lessons are typical fare for a commencement speech:

Challenge yourself. Take some risks in your life.

Persevere. Making your mark on the world is hard … It takes patience, it takes commitment, and it comes with plenty of failure along the way.

It was the first lesson Senator Obama cited that caught my attention and is not so standard fare — for commencement addresses or for political speeches:

The world doesn’t just revolve around you.

He continues:

There’s a lot of talk in this country about the federal deficit. But I think we should talk more about our empathy deficit – the ability to put ourselves in someone else’s shoes; to see the world through those who are different from us – the child who’s hungry, the laid-off steelworker, the immigrant woman cleaning your dorm room.

As you go on in life, cultivating this quality of empathy will become harder, not easier. There’s no community service requirement in the real world; no one forcing you to care. You’ll be free to live in neighborhoods with people who are exactly like yourself, and send your kids to the same schools, and narrow your concerns to what’s going in your own little circle.

Not only that – we live in a culture that discourages empathy. A culture that too often tells us our principle goal in life is to be rich, thin, young, famous, safe, and entertained. A culture where those in power too often encourage these selfish impulses.

They will tell you that the Americans who sleep in the streets and beg for food got there because they’re all lazy or weak of spirit. That the inner-city children who are trapped in dilapidated schools can’t learn and won’t learn and so we should just give up on them entirely. That the innocent people being slaughtered and expelled from their homes half a world away are somebody else’s problem to take care of.

I hope you don’t listen to this. I hope you choose to broaden, and not contract, your ambit of concern. Not because you have an obligation to those who are less fortunate, although you do have that obligation. Not because you have a debt to all of those who helped you get to where you are, although you do have that debt.

It’s because you have an obligation to yourself. Because our individual salvation depends on collective salvation. And because it’s only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you will realize your true potential – and become full-grown.

To read the rest of the speech, download the .pdf file: Remarks: Southern New Hampshire University Commencement.

the desire to please you

the desire to please you

A prayer from Thomas Merton:

My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me, I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it. Therefore, I will trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.

I had never seen this prayer quoted before, but now I have “happened” upon it twice in three weeks! Three weeks ago, I used it in my eulogy for a ninety-two year-old retired music teacher and unretired Christian who had it cut and pasted into the front cover of his Bible. And today I read it again quoted as an afterword to a book entitled Listening Hearts, a book about discerning the call of God and the role of community in discerning call and supporting ministry.

It is a wonderfully humble and wonderfully hopeful prayer!

But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you.

There is much that we do not know and much that we will never know. And it is true that even when we want more than anything else to do what God wants, we may struggle with knowing just what that is or how to do it. But if wanting itself matters … If it is our passion itself that pleases God … If it is our love itself that honors God … May it be so! And may we love God with all our heart minds and strength!

And may we walk side by side with our Christian sisters and brothers with this prayer on our lips, because if we do, if we come to our common Christian enterprise with this kind of humility, with this kind of passion, with this kind of trust, there will be little to drive us apart, and much to hold us together. I do not stand over against you or your values or your opinions, but with you in our common desire to please God, as we acknowledge to ourselves and to each other that even in our zeal we are not always certain of the way!

happy new year

happy new year

Humility is the first step
Acknowledging that you cannot
Pull the right strings, making life dance to your beat, or
Push the right buttons to guarantee the future
You have in mind.

Now is the time! the time to release pride and fear, the time to
Embrace the God who embraces you, to
Welcome the future God has in mind, to say

Yes! to God and Yes! to God’s way, to
Expect that God’s way leads to a glorious future for us all, and to
Act on that expectation, hoping and loving and serving and making peace,
Right here, right now!

he’d come here

he’d come here

I want to share my favorite Christmas story with any of you who haven’t heard it before. It was written by Harriet Richie and published in the December 13, 1995 issue of The Christian Century.

After the Christmas Eve service, my husband announced that he was hungry for breakfast. “There must be some place open,” he muttered. We piled in the car, and our son quickly placed an order for three hamburgers. After driving around for a while we headed down the interstate and finally found a truck stop, which was almost deserted. By now the children were sleepy. My husband led us to the door.

The jukebox was playing something like “When You Leave, Walk Out Backwards So I’ll Think You’re Coming In.” The only suggestions of Christmas were the multicolored blinking lights strung around the large window. The air smelled of coffee, bacon and stale cigarette smoke. At the counter a one-armed man in a baseball cap was drinking Pepsi from a bottle. Two other men sat around a table talking, eating and drinking. At such an hour I couldn’t help wondering where they had come from or were going.

We chose a booth beside the window because the children wanted to see if the lights would make our faces change colors. A thin woman named Rita came to take our order. She looked like any waitress would look who had been unlucky enough to draw the late shift on Christmas Eve. Old for her years, I guessed–she wore her hair tucked behind her ears the way I do when mine won’t do anything else. Rita managed a weary-looking smile as she handed us the menus. Our son was holding the salt shaker upside-down, spilling salt into his hand and licking it. I gave him a stare and looked up in time to see Rita wink at him.

“No hamburgers,” we told the children. “This is breakfast.”

They moaned and ordered pancakes with sausage. They defiantly ate the sausage between the pancakes, hamburger-style.

This wasn’t my first breakfast at 1 a.m., but the others had been on somebody’s china. The snob in me was enjoying feeling out of place. Years from now, I thought, we’ll laugh and say, “Remember the Christmas we ate breakfast at that truck stop? That awful music and those tacky lights?”

I was staring out the window thinking such thoughts when an old Volkswagon van with Texas license plates and an overload of luggage drove up. A bearded young man in jeans got out. He walked around and opened the door for a young woman who was holding a baby. They hurried inside and took a booth near the back.

“Where you headed?” somebody asked them. I couldn’t hear the answer, but I imagined grandparents somewhere anxiously waiting to see their grandchild for the first time.

As Rita took their order, the baby started to cry. The father lifted the baby to his shoulder, but it didn’t help. Rita poured them coffee. The mother took the baby and began rocking it in her arms.

“Why doesn’t the baby stop crying?” our daughter asked.

“She probably wants something to eat,” I told her, remembering all the times I’d tried to drink a quick cup of coffee before a feeding. As if on cue, the baby would demand immediate attention.

The mother picked up the diaper bag and started to leave. She held the baby’s head against her neck as if she could muffle the noise.

Rita reached over and held out her arms. “Drink your coffee, hon. Let’s see what I can do.” There was something about the way Rita took the infant that made me think she’d raised half a dozen of her own. She began talking, walking, playing with the baby. Rita showed her to the man in the baseball cap. He began whistling and making silly faces, and the baby stopped crying. Rita showed her the blinking lights and the lights on the jukebox. She brought her over to us. “Just look at this little darlin’. Mine are so big and grown,” she said.

The one-armed fellow took a pot of coffee from a burner and started waiting on the tables. As he finished refilling our mugs, I felt tears in my eyes. My husband wanted to know what was wrong.

“Nothing. Just Christmas,” I told him, reaching in my purse for a Kleenex and a quarter. “Go see if you can find a Christmas song on the jukebox,” I told the children.

When they were gone, I said, “He’d come here, wouldn’t he?”

“Who?”

“Jesus. If Jesus were born in this town tonight and the choices were our neighborhood, the church or this truck stop, it would be here, wouldn’t it?”

He didn’t answer right away, but looked around the place, looked at the people. Finally he said, “Either here or a homeless shelter.”

“That’s what bothers me,” I said. “When we first got here I felt sorry for these people because they probably aren’t going home to neighborhoods where the houses have candles in the windows and wreaths on the doors. And listening to that awful music, I thought, I’ll bet nobody here has even heard of Handel. Now I think that more than any place I know, this is where Christmas is. But I don’t belong.”

As we walked to the car, my husband put his arm around me. “Remember, the angel said, `I bring good news of great joy to all people.”

“Thanks,” I said, but I wasn’t reassured.

The houses in our neighborhood were dark. As we passed the Milfords I wondered what Christmas Day would be like for them. Their daughter died in a car accident during the summer. Next door Jack McCarthy had lost his job. A little farther down the street lived the Baileys, whose marriage was hanging together by the slimmest thread. Mrs. Smith’s grown son had died from AIDS. Maybe we’re not so different from the people in the truck stop, I thought.

making sense, moving forward

making sense, moving forward

We live in a world that is so different from the world of the generations that have preceded us. The pace of change is dizzying. The amount of accessible — unavoidably accessible! — information is overwhelming. We bear the burden of knowing too much, almost more than we can bear to know. It is not only the problems of family and community and region that weigh on our hearts, but the problems of a whole world: famine and disease and natural disaster, war and oppression and unabashed genocide, injustice and mistrust and entrenched hatred. We know so much about the world and about the people who fill it, so much more about so many more people, so many people so different from us as we are so different from them — different traditions, different dreams, different perceptions, different values, different beliefs.

How do we make sense of this world? How do we stretch minds and hearts to “fit” all the information, all the people, in a way that allows us to move forward with eyes and ears still open? As believers, how do we reconcile ourselves and our faith to diverging and even openly hostile points of view?

Some do it by holding tightly to received traditions, by clinging to a clearly defined spiritual calculus that distinguishes between those who are right and those who are wrong, by subscribing to a parochial religious worldview that leaves most of humanity on the outside. In the face of a world full of questions, these folks survive by adopting a faith full of ready answers.

Others do it by redefining “truth” and “righteousness” and “salvation:” what matters is what is true for you, what is right is what allows us to co-exist, salvation is avoidance of conflict. In the face of a world full of questions, these folks survive by believing there really aren’t any answers.

But is there a third option? Is there a way for believers other than strict fundamentalism or uncritical pluralism? Can we make sense of this world without ignoring the majority of the facts? Can we move forward without abandoning our loyalty to a personal God? We need a third way, because the church is being torn apart, dangerously polarized, torn apart by people who are scared, scared of losing their faith, scared of losing their lives, polarized by people scared of obsolescence, scared of irrelevance, scared of being marginalized, scared of losing their souls.

I believe there is a third way. The first two ways have one important feature in common: fear … fear of losing, fear of criticism, fear of being wrong, fear of being irrelevant, fear of the daunting and dizzying and befuddling and overwhelming world in which we live! And the natural response to fear is … fight or flight! Taking control of a situation that is out of control by removing myself or by arming myself. “Solving” the threatening situation by taking a unilateral course of action. But, as believers, when we act unilaterally, when we “take control” — one way or another, we leave God out. We discover a third way when we let God in, when we listen — really listen — to God, instead of deciding for ourselves what we must do to survive and to “protect” the faith!

Perfect love drives out fear.

Love is the third way! Loving God with all your soul and all your mind and all your strength … and loving your neighbor as you love yourself.

God is not a cipher! God is not whatever we think God is or whatever we want God to be! God is a particular being, with a distinctive character and distinctive intentions. It is possible for us to be right about what we think we know of God, and it is possble for us to be utterly wrong about what we think we know of God! We must seek God, listen to God, wait for God, not pretend we already know exactly what God wants, or that we can never know what God wants. Our task is not to use God, as a war club or a slogan, but to love God.

In the same way, your neighbor is not a cipher, but a person, a person who deserves to be loved. Your primary task is not to defeat your neighbor, protect yourself from your neighbor, convert your neighbor, enlighten your neighbor, but to love your neighbor. Love your neighbor!

Don’t be scared! Love God and trust God to love you. In the face of a world full of questions, you don’t have to have all the answers … but you know there are answers!

You don’t have to fight or run away. You can move forward, with confidence in God, with hope for the future, with readiness to love your neighbor who is so very different from you, but equally loved by God. As believers, we take our cue from God, the God revealed in Jesus Christ, a God of love, a God of mercy, a God of grace. We love, we show mercy, we extend grace.

We don’t need to take control. We leave that to God. We know our job …

whose church is it?

whose church is it?

Christ is like a single body, which has many parts; it is still one body, even though it is made up of different parts.

So, then, the eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” Nor can the head say to the feet, “Well, I don’t need you!”

But that is just what we are doing! Saying we don’t need each other. Saying we’d be better off without each other. It breaks my heart! We call ourselves The United Church of Christ, but I wonder. Sometimes, it seems, we are hardly “united” and hardly “of Christ.”

We are increasingly polarized as a church, mimicking the increasing polarization of American society when we should be resisting it and showing the world another way! We show ourselves to be “just like everybody else,” as resentful and stubborn and proud and controlling as everybody else. When we don’t get our own way, we pout and call names.

It is increasingly difficult to “live in the middle” in the United Church of Christ, which is probably a poor description of what it is I am advocating. Being “in the middle” is not about compromising, but about being a bridge; not about being lukewarm or noncommittal, but about understanding and loving both “sides” … the eyes and the hands, the head and the feet.

The church belongs to Christ. not to us, and Christ the Lord hardly needs us to defend him! He wants us to love him … and to love each other.

The evangelical “wing” of the United Church of Christ has something of great value to offer the whole church. But to accuse the church of “abandoning historic Christianity,” to seek to divide the church against itself, to encourage and support churches in withdrawing from the United Church of Christ shows no love to the church nor to the Christ to whom the church belongs.

The liberal “wing” of the United Church of Christ has something of great value to offer the whole church. But to mock and ostracize and marginalize evangelical folks who are genuinely concerned about the integrity of the church and its witness, who genuinely love God and want to discern and to do God’s will only does harm to the cause of Christ and cripples the church’s witness.

It is about doing God’s will, about praying with Jesus: Thy will be done. It is about discerning God’s will — together. Sometimes, it will take time and patience and generosity and selflessness and lots of humility to reach a place of agreement — or better, a place of discernment — where we do know together what it is God is calling us to do.

But in the meanwhile, there is much that God does will that is abundantly clear!

  • God calls us to love the Lord our God above everything else, everything else. It is hard to imagine that we could turn our backs on each other if we would genuinely join hearts and voices in professing our love to God.
  • God calls us to love each other. Not to judge each other — that job God guards jealously — but to love each other.
  • And God calls us to be one. We know that! We take our motto from Jesus’ prayer: That they may all be one. Do we mean it? Can we show the world what Jesus wanted us to show the world, a people united, not by ideology or politics or race or even religious agenda, but by love alone, a love for God and a love for each other that never gives up?